WP169 | Staying the Course (Part 3 of 4): Leading People Well When You’re Tired

Some seasons of leadership don’t feel loud or dramatic. They feel heavy. Quiet. Exhausting in a way sleep doesn’t fix.

If you’re leading a practice right now and finding yourself thinking, “I don’t have the energy for one more conversation,” or “Why does this feel so hard when I’m doing everything right?”—this episode is for you.

Today, we’re talking about what it really looks like to lead when you’re tired. Not just physically tired, but soul tired. The kind of fatigue that comes from carrying responsibility for clients, staff, finances, and vision—often without realizing how much weight you’ve been holding.

This is the third episode in our January series, Staying the Course: Faithful Leadership in Seasons That Ebb and Flow, and it’s one of the most honest conversations I’ve had about leadership. I’m sharing from a very real place—walking through family health challenges, a demanding season of business growth, and my own need to slow down and pay attention to what my body and spirit are asking for.

In this episode, we’ll talk about:

  • How leadership fatigue actually shows up (often before we name it)

  • Why burnout doesn’t mean you’re failing—it often means you care deeply

  • The hidden cost of self-sacrifice in faith-based leadership

  • What Scripture shows us about rest, boundaries, and sustainable leadership

  • And how caring for yourself is one of the most loving things you can do for your team

If you’re navigating a slower season, feeling worn down, or questioning your capacity to keep going—this conversation is an invitation to pause, reflect, and lead yourself with the same compassion you offer everyone else.

When Leadership Fatigue Shows Up Quietly

Leadership fatigue doesn’t usually announce itself. It doesn’t show up with a big warning sign or a clear breaking point. Most of the time, it creeps in quietly.

You might notice it when:

  • You avoid conversations you know you should have

  • You feel slower to respond or less clear in your communication

  • You’re more easily irritated or distracted

  • You just don’t want to deal with one more problem

None of that means you’re failing as a leader. In fact, it often means the opposite—you’ve been carrying responsibility faithfully for a long time.

Soul Tired, Not “I Need a Nap” Tired

In this episode, I talk about the difference between being physically tired and what I call soul tired. Physical tired can often be helped with rest, sleep, or time off. Soul tired runs deeper. It comes from long seasons of responsibility, decision-making, caring for others, and holding emotional weight.

This kind of tired doesn’t mean you don’t care anymore. It means you care deeply—and you’ve been carrying a lot.

Faith-Based Leadership and the Myth of Self-Sacrifice

One of the biggest challenges I see for faith-based practice owners is the belief—often unspoken—that self-sacrifice is always virtuous. That if we’re tired, it means we should push harder, serve more, or carry more quietly.

But faith-based leadership does not mean doing everything for everyone all the time.

Even Jesus withdrew. He rested. He stepped away from the crowds. He didn’t meet every demand placed on Him.

Caring for yourself is not separate from caring for your team. It’s part of it.

Your Team Feels Your Fatigue Before You Name It

One of the hardest truths about leadership fatigue is this: your team often feels it before you do. Fatigue shows up in mixed messages, unclear boundaries, delayed decisions, and lack of presence.

Your team doesn’t need perfection—but they do need clarity. And clarity becomes very difficult to access when you’re depleted.

Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish. It’s one of the most loving things you can do for the people you lead.

What Faithful Leadership Looks Like in Tired Seasons

Leadership in tired seasons looks different than leadership in high-energy seasons. It often means:

  • Simplifying communication

  • Repeating expectations instead of adding new ones

  • Addressing fewer issues—but addressing them more clearly

  • Asking for support instead of withdrawing

  • Creating rhythms of renewal instead of waiting for burnout

Sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is slow down enough to lead with clarity, even when energy feels low.

You’re Not Weak—You’re Leading Something That Matters

If you’re feeling tired right now, here’s what I want you to hear:

  • You are not weak.

  • You are not failing.

  • You are not doing leadership “wrong.”

You are leading in a demanding role—and God meets us in our weariness, not just our strength.

Rest isn’t a reward for finishing everything. It’s a rhythm we build into faithful leadership.

Links and Resources

Get my book, The Practice of Becoming, at my website https://www.wisepracticeconsulting.com

Join the Wise Practice Membership Community

Learn More about Wise Practice Consulting

Connect with Wise Practice on Instagram

Connect with Whitney Owens on Facebook

Check out all of the podcasts on the PsychCraft Network

  • [00:00:00] Whitney Owens: Before we jump in today's episode, I wanna share something I am super excited about today. January 20th is the official release date of my first book. It's a lent devotional called The Practice of Becoming, and it's now available on Amazon. I wrote this book specifically for you, people who are spinning their lives, caring for others, practice owners, therapists, leaders, wanting a steady and reflective way to move through the Linton season.

    [00:00:32] If you're looking for a devotional that's gonna invite you to slowing down. Reflection, staying grounded in your faith during the Lent season, which is a busy time for practice owners. I'd love for you to check it out. You can search for the practice of becoming on Amazon or find the link in the show notes and order your copy today.

    [00:00:53] And once you've read it, I'd love for you to leave me a review. I'm excited to get this book into the Hands of Practice owners. Hi, I'm Whitney Owens. I'm a group practice owner and faith-based practice consultant, and I'm here to tell you that you can have it all. Wanna grow your practice, wanna grow your faith, wanna enjoy your life outside of work, you've come to the right place.

    [00:01:17] Each week on the Wise Practice Podcast, I will give you the action steps to have a successful faith-based practice while also having a good time. Now let's get started.

    [00:01:29] Jingle: Where she grows your practice and she don't play. She does business with a twist of faith. It's Whitney Owen and Wise Practice Podcast.

    [00:01:41] Whitney Owen and Wise Practice

    [00:01:44] Whitney Owens: Podcast. Welcome back to the Wise Practice Podcast. In this episode, this is a three part series for January. Staying the course faithful leadership in a practice that ebbs and flows, right? So, so far we've had two episodes in this series, so I would encourage you to go back and listen to those.

    [00:02:04] But this is the third episode in the series. So we have been talking about leading faithfully when our numbers. Don't feel as faithful, right when they're feeling unsteady. And why pulling back during these slow seasons often actually costs you more in the long run. So today I'm gonna talk about something that feels especially real for practice owners, and I kind of am humorous and laughing right now as I say it because I'm particularly tired right now.

    [00:02:30] We're gonna talk about leading people when you're tired. Now, I'm particularly tired right now as many of you have maybe seen or have posted on social media. My daughter had a significant back surgery just a few weeks ago. I'm recording this a few weeks before it goes out, but we're recovering from a scoliosis surgery and from a busy time of Christmas, and then I got sick, and so I'm podcasting today even in the midst of a slight cold.

    [00:02:56] And so I'm also feeling tired, but we're really gonna talk more about. Tired. Not just physically, but that deep kind of sense of soul. Tired, right? So tired looks like so many different things. You might feel physically tired, like I just described. You know, where you get a good night's sleep, feels a lot better, or maybe a few good nights of sleep.

    [00:03:20] Or you're tired after a long day of running around with your kids doing sessions at work. Or maybe you have a really intense workout that you feel good about, but boy, your body is sore afterwards. So yes, this is an important type of tired for us to focus on more like a physical tired. But today we're gonna talk more about that deeper tired feeling that we feel as practice owners.

    [00:03:42] You can call it fatigue, you can call it burnout. It has a lot of different ways. I kind of think of it as soul tired. We are looking at the soul, kind of tired that needs a soul solution. Not tired because you don't care. You're not tired because you don't wanna be involved in something, but you're tired because you have been carrying the responsibility of your practice.

    [00:04:12] Your clients, your life for a really long time. So if you have ever thought to yourself, I really don't have the energy to keep doing this, I don't wanna have one more conversation, I don't wanna deal with one more problem. I don't even wanna go to work today. This episode is for you. But before I go any further, I wanna first normalize this for you.

    [00:04:38] It is okay that you feel this way. I think we say this to our clients often, but how often do we pay attention to this for ourselves or give us that permission? I was just talking to a therapist earlier today and she said, I never realized how tired I was until I slowed down and slept and paid attention to myself, right?

    [00:05:00] We haven't done anything wrong for this soul tired experience that we have. In fact, we're doing a lot of things right. But we don't wanna ignore. We wanna pay attention. So we're paying attention to what our body, our spirit, is telling us, right? As a faith-based practice center, my soul and my spirit are very interconnected and speak to me.

    [00:05:23] It's the Holy Spirit within me trying to show me something. In fact, Jesus felt tired. Mark 7 24, which by the way, this is also in the Lent book in one of the devotionals. The practice of becoming that is being released today. But in Mark 7 24, Jesus enters a house and he doesn't want anyone to know that he's there.

    [00:05:50] So when I read that, I thought to myself, wow, he, he didn't wanna be seen and known. I can tell you that has happened to me many a times where I go to a party or I walk into work, nobody see me. I just wanna go to my office and get this thing done right? I am tired, I'm tired, and I bet you can relate to that feeling.

    [00:06:09] Maybe you're going to your kids' football game and you're hoping no one comes up to you in the stands and talks about the problems going on at the school because you're a therapist and you should be able to answer those problems. So many times we go to the supermarket or the grocery store and we're thinking, I hope I don't see a client because I don't have the energy for it today.

    [00:06:25] Right? We don't need, we don't wanna be bothered and we're tired. So one of the hardest things about leadership fatigue is that it doesn't necessarily announce itself. It's not like, Hey, here it comes. You're gonna get really tired soon. Usually it creeps in. And shows up really quietly for me, often I'm taking on and taking on and I'm like, I'm doing just fun.

    [00:06:50] This isn't a problem. And then all of a sudden it hits me like a Mack truck and I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't take another step. Right? It quietly, it crouched on me. Even recently, as I was sharing, um, earlier my daughter and her surgery, she actually had. Two surgeries, believe it or not. So it has been a crazy three months.

    [00:07:10] She had to have a brain surgery back in October for a condition called Chiari malformation Type one if you're interested in learning more about it. So we dealt with that surgery, and then we had a few weeks in between, and then we had this significant back surgery for her scoliosis. So fortunately the surgeries were very successful on the other side of it, but I had my game face on.

    [00:07:32] Yeah, I was like, pull your big girl pants up, get through this. Be strong for your daughter. And now I'm getting on the other side of it and I'm like, wow, I was holding a lot. Right? And I think we do that as practice owners. In fact, I have slept more the past three days than I have slept in a very long time.

    [00:07:52] And we are doing that every day in the way we care for our clients, the way we run our business. And that fatigue can really set in before we realize it. So you might be thinking, okay, well what does this actually look like? And of course. Burnout, fatigue. It's gonna look different to everybody, right? But a couple of things that I see in practice owners is not doing tasks, not running your business, being slower to jump on things than normal.

    [00:08:22] Maybe avoiding conversations that you need to have 'cause you just don't wanna deal with it. Shorter emails, less clarity in your communicating. Letting things slide that you normally wouldn't let Slide, maybe feeling irritated, wanting meetings to end more quickly. These are all things that I see within myself.

    [00:08:42] And look, none of this means that you're a bad leader. In fact, my guess is you're a pretty great one. It's just that the level of responsibility has piled on and it means that you were human. In fact, I just sat down with my husband over this break. I really enjoy Christmas break in the sense of I'm not in the office sometimes when I do my best thinking about work and reflection on myself, I was thinking.

    [00:09:11] Man, did I, did I always have this level of responsibility? Have I always been this distracted? And he was like, Whitney, as the responsibility increases your distraction level and difficulty being present increases, I think it's so hard for us as leaders, we don't even see it happening. And so for me, I know that when I get easily distracted.

    [00:09:33] I'm on my way to fatigue and burnout when I look back at 2025. It was a heavy year for me. I had a lot of responsibilities. We opened up our second location, so it was my first time purchasing a building, finalizing the construction, opening that location. I was having a change in my leadership and my structure and my practice, and I was feeling so overwhelmed.

    [00:10:03] I did not wanna deal with my business. I wanted to run the other way. I didn't wanna take on problems. I wanted it to just coast and I was burnt out. Y'all, it reminds me though, this is part of leadership and the Bible certainly talks about weariness over and over again because this is what happens for leaders, those that serve.

    [00:10:29] They experienced exhaustion. It's not that I lacked faith or had a bad relationship with God, whatever that means. It just means that the leadership was heavy and I didn't know what I was doing at times. The problem isn't that I was tired. The problem is when you're trying to lead and you're tired and you're doing nothing about it, right?

    [00:10:52] And so that year, last year was a game changing year for me. Because that was when I created a leadership team that's got my back, that's moving things forward when I'm tired and now I have more energy to focus on the things I'm excited about. So a big part of my year was creating not just people in leadership, because I think that's important too, but a team of leaders that comes together.

    [00:11:17] There's so much more power in that, and it brings me so much more energy and clarity. So what many leaders don't realize. Is that your team feels your fatigue before you even name it, right? They see it before we see it. They see our mixed messages. They see the difficulty communicating. They see our moods.

    [00:11:40] Lemme tell you, they definitely see my mood, the delayed feedback that we give, unclear boundaries, not wanting to address things. The list goes on. In fact, for me recently. I was told that my lack of focus is seen by the rest of the leadership team. I was like, whoa, that's a hit to the gut, right? I was very grateful that someone on my leadership team told me this, but I was lacking presence because I was so thinking about all the things and running the business.

    [00:12:13] I wasn't focused on the most important things, which is really just being with my team, listening to the Holy Spirit in our leadership team meetings and in the way we run the practice and where he's moving instead of looking at all the things that I'm doing. Your team does not need you to be perfect.

    [00:12:29] You will never reach perfection, but they do need you to bring clarity. They need you to slow down. They need you to take care of yourself, and in fact, the best thing you can do for them is take care of yourself. Because only you can run your business, right? Your clients need you to take care of yourself, and your team needs you to take care of yourself when clarity disappears, so when you're fatigued, overwhelmed not seeing the vision of your business, your anxiety will grow and so will the anxiety of your business.

    [00:13:02] Often leaders interpret their anxiety as the team's not functioning well, or what did I do wrong, or why are they so inconsistent? When really you're, you're kind of the star, that's the straw that's stirring the drink here, right? You've gotta take care of yourself to gain that clarity, to keep the team moving forward.

    [00:13:21] It's the most loving thing you can do for your team. So one of the challenges for faith-based practice owners I particularly see in this area, and it's, it's really an unidentified or unspoken of, I should say, issue, is this idea of self-sacrifice as being virtuous. So we don't, I mean, honestly, most of us have no idea we're doing it right.

    [00:13:45] Other people can probably see it, but we don't see it in ourselves. 'cause to us, we really wanna serve. We want to do good, and that is excellent. But when it gets to a point where we're sacrificing so much that we're hurting ourselves and our team, that's a different thing. It's almost like people want to show off their exhaustion.

    [00:14:05] We see this all the time when someone says, how are you today? Well, I'm really busy. I have all these things I'm doing, or, you know, I run this really large practice, it makes this much money. Sadly, people talk like that, or I serve this many clients today and I'm just so tired, and yes, it's good, but if you're saying it in a, in a self-sacrificial way, like, look how great I am, it's not really, it's not really good.

    [00:14:29] You're hurting yourself and those around you. So self sacrificing. That is not a virtuous thing. Even though we try to make it that way. It has a negative impact on our clients and our team. So we've gotta focus on how to take care of ourselves. In fact, when you don't care well for you, you're hurting everyone.

    [00:14:47] And often we lie to ourselves and we say, this is something good when we sacrifice, but it's really not the case. And scripture does bring some clarity sacrifice versus burnout, right? Jesus, the ultimate sacrifice, right? Also pulled away and cared for himself. So Jesus was human, experienced exhaustion, certainly the weight of leadership, and withdrew regularly to be alone.

    [00:15:20] He rested. He stepped away from the crowds. He did not meet every demand that was placed on him. He did not heal every single person in every single situation. So faith-based leadership does not mean that you do everything for everybody all the time. In fact, when I think about leadership and Christ, how he must have known.

    [00:15:45] Who needed his touch in that moment, in, in a special way. And I think as leaders, we have got to pay attention to that. Where do we need to serve in this moment and at this time? And when we are burnt out and overwhelmed, you're not gonna have that clarity, right? But when you're taking care of yourself and you're in step with the spirit, you will have that clarity.

    [00:16:07] So self faith-based, sorry. Faith-based leadership does not mean absorbing everything yourself, taking care of everybody, avoiding boundaries, and taking on the emotional load for your team and for you and for your clients. It means stewarding yourself so you can lead well. It means setting healthy boundaries and finding a team to carry the load with you.

    [00:16:28] So before we can lead, we have to lead ourselves honestly. We have to take a look at what's going on. So this means when you're feeling a avoidant, when you feel depleted, when you feel annoyed, when you're over-functioning, you've gotta stop and pay attention. These are the most important times to do that and start reflecting.

    [00:16:57] Find activities and things that help you to be reflective. For me, that's having contemplation. Having prayer, listening to worship music, having deep conversations with other people, getting feedback on my leadership, reading, taking time off, going on a run is a really good for me. Right. So when you're finding yourself feeling the depletion, the annoyance, I know it is the hardest time to back away, but you've gotta do it sooner rather than later.

    [00:17:31] 'cause it will only get worse with time. And you're hurting everyone else when you're hurting yourself by not taking care of yourself. So yes, it's a, it's the things I was just saying, it's, it's having a morning of contemplation. It's writing in your journal, but it's also not just the one time aspects of this, it's creating those rhythms of renewal.

    [00:17:54] So for me, yes, a run helps me. I've gotta run consistently to have consistent renewal in my life. I've gotta consistently sleep eight hours a night. I've gotta consistently eat well, drink less alcohol and go to my own therapy. So as we're sitting here in January and you know, new Year's resolutions, yeah, those are great, but it's really just about what you need in your life, right?

    [00:18:21] If I'm saying something that's resonating with you, even if you can take one new rhythm. Or one new deep soul renewal activity and do that. That would be so great. Creating these rhythms in your life will make a difference and you'll be less tired as a leader. Also, creating a leadership team that supports you and helps you or some kind of community where you can vent these things to just recently in the Wise Practice community.

    [00:18:53] Which is our online membership community for faith-based practice owners. One of the practice owners had written how tired she was and had working so hard in her practice and it had grown and then it decreased and she wasn't really sure what next steps to take and, and she just said, I'm just so glad I have a place to share this.

    [00:19:11] Right. So just getting it out there in a community of saying, this is how hard it is. Running a practice brought her strength. Not only encouragement through the messages that she received back, but also the prayers that we give her, right? So when you're feeling like you're approaching burnout or you're at burnout, you're tired as a leader.

    [00:19:33] Some gentle questions to think about is what conversations are you avoiding because you're tired, right? Where are you unclear because clarity is gonna take too much effort. And what boundaries do you need to set to better serve others? And you might wanna come up with some of your own questions, but those are some of the ones that I can ask myself.

    [00:20:00] 'cause those are the ways that I experience burnout. Faithful leadership, tired seasons looks different than leadership in high energy seasons. It often means simplifying your communication. Repeating expectations instead of adding new ones, addressing fewer things and addressing them more clearly and asking for support instead of withdrawing.

    [00:20:24] So even with my leadership team this year, I have been tired and have had to make some important game changing steps to move forward. I had lost seven therapists in 2025. That is a lot of people. We hired eight therapists. Also a lot of people, and if you are a group practice owner or you've worked somewhere you've had to hire, hiring is so exhausting.

    [00:20:54] Right. I also implemented traction this year, which is the EOS model, which I've talked about in previous episodes. It is game changer in moving the practice forward, but it is a lot of work to implement. And so the past year has been so much change, and I've had to do a lot of leading through all that change.

    [00:21:17] But as we move into 2026, just like we discussed here, I want to repeat expectations and not add new ones. I want to simplify the way I communicate with my team and address things sooner rather than later. I'm working on SOPs, so things run more smoothly. Instead of more complicated, I'm gonna empower and delegate my leadership team more so that I take on less, so I can focus more on the things that matter.

    [00:21:42] I am embracing my role as a visionary in the business and gonna put my time and energy to move the business forward by taking care of myself and empowering my therapists and leadership team to do the same. The most important thing we can do is take care of ourselves so that we can run the business well.

    [00:22:02] Running a business requires our presence and we cannot have presence if without paying attention to ourselves and what we are doing. Sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is lead with clarity, even if you don't feel energized. So if you're feeling tired right now, this is what I want you to hear.

    [00:22:23] You are not weak. You are not failing. You are not doing it wrong. You are leading in a very demanding role. Scripture reminds us that God meets us in our weariness, not just our strength. Rest is not a reward for finishing everything right. It's a rhythm. True rest is a rhythm that you build into your faithful life.

    [00:22:49] Your leadership matters even when you do feel depleted. Caring for yourself is not separate from caring for your team. So as we move through the rest of the week, here are a few questions for you to reflect on. Where has fatigue been shaping your leadership? What conversations would actually bring relief if the dressed and what boundaries might support your team more than over-functioning?

    [00:23:16] In our final episode of the series, next week we're gonna talk about what faithful investment actually looks like. So that's your money, your support, your systems, your growth in a way that's steady, wise, and aligned with your values. But before we go, just a quick reminder, the Lent devotional. The practice of becoming is now available on Amazon.

    [00:23:36] So if you're looking for a thoughtful grounding companion for your linten season, you can find it by searching a title on Amazon, the practice of Becoming or using the link in the show notes. Thank you for being here with me and continuing with me through these series. I'm really glad you're listening.

    [00:23:52] Till next time.

    [00:23:56] Jingle: So click on follow and leave a review and keep on loving this work we do with Whitney Owens and The Wise Practice Podcast, Whitney Owens and

    [00:24:09] Whitney Owens: Wise Practice Podcast. Special thanks to Marty Altman for the music in this podcast. The Wise Practice Podcast is part of the Site Craft Podcast Network. A collaboration of independent podcasters focused on helping people live more meaningful and productive lives.

    [00:24:28] To learn more about the other amazing podcasts in the network, head on over to site craft network.com. The Wise Practice podcast represents the opinions of Whitney Owens and her guests. This podcast is for educational purposes only, and the content should not be taken as legal advice. If you have legal questions, please consult an attorney.

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WP170 | Staying the Course (Part 4 of 4): What Faithful Investment Actually Looks Like This Year

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WP168 | Staying the Course (Part 2 of 4): Why Pulling Back Costs You More Later